I’m mad. I’m pissed. I’m a little bit more than angry at myself.
Today we did Fran.
Having never attempted Fran before, I was excited to see it on the board for today’s WOD. We warmed up with PVC-pipe stretches and drills, then practiced snatches: 3 snatches EMOM for 8 minutes. I had never really done snatches before, so I loved practicing these, but was frustrated with the low weight I was using (about 35 pounds). I got my technique down, and was happy with that improvement.
When we got to Fran, I was excited and ready to smash the workout. The first few thrusters were okay, but then I realized that I had probably added on too much weight. I was thrusting 45 pounds, which on a normal day, would work wonderfully, but today is unseasonably humid. You could probably drink water right out of the air. The fog is unreal. Whether that played a factor, I don’t know, but I’m not about to make excuses.
After the first 13 thrusters, I had started shaking and let go of the bar. I got back under it within 15 seconds, but I had to drop the bar again before I finished the first 21. The pull-ups were a struggle; I was shaking the whole time. By the end of the second set of thrusters (15), I was shaking and had to take multiple stops. My coach thought I was on the third set. At this point, I was angry and got through the third set of thrusters no problem, but when I got to the pull-up bar for the very last pull-ups (9), I was on the verge of tears. I was so mad at myself. Why was I shaking, and why couldn’t I just get this done like I usually do? I wasn’t at Rx weight, and I certainly hadn’t gotten my kipping pull-up down yet, so it seemed silly to me that I was struggling.
I finished Fran at 8:25 and immediately plopped down on the floor to wipe myself off and breathe, as well as chug some water. My coach came up to me and asked me how I was feeling. “Not happy,” I said. “I did not do well.”
What I learned today is that you’re not always going to have optimal conditions, not always going to break records, but as long as you push yourself to the ultimate and do your best, you’ll always be better the next time. I’m not giving up and I’m certainly not going to let myself be dragged down by a lousy time. I’m going to stretch, regroup, and be better next time.
Good, better, best, always kick your own ass.